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Daily Archives: November 18, 2009

A Tale of Two Letters

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If letter writing is a lost art, then given the state of the publishing industry these days, writing letters to the editors of newspapers must be doubly endangered. Which is why it’s always such a joy to see people still writing in – to The Economist, for example.

For as long as I can remember, it is the one letters page that I have always considered a must read. Sure, most of it is riddled with official responses from various governments outraged at the “newspaper’s” often critical reporting but there’s always at least one in every lot that is truly hilarious and spot on.

Sometimes, it even manages to be hilarious and spot on about the official responses from various governments outraged at the newspaper’s often critical reporting. Like so:

Metaphysical geography

SIR – I have a suggestion for your problem regarding Chinese, Japanese, South Korean and Russian diplomats berating The Economist about the labelling of territories in maps of north-east Asia (Banyan, October 17th). Since none of those countries’ representatives can agree on the names of bodies of water and islands in the region, you should just create your own based on a more accurate reflection of the locations in question.

For instance, how about Rocky Eyot of No Significant Value, Polluted Sea of Calm, Islands of Always Hammered by Typhoons and It Is Too Cold Here to Care Who Is In Charge.

Todd Allen
Rockville, Maryland

Hmmm. That sounds like a model that India needs to adopt immediately. No more wrangling about whether our cities sound authentic enough to suit the political tastes of this party or that faction, no worries about whether this new moniker offends that community or this one.

Delhi – Fat Cat Palace

Mumbai – Overcrowded Island for Movies, Mafia and Marathi Manoos Only

Kolkata – Yesterday’s Black Hole of Joy

Chennai – Frying Pan by the Sea

Bengalooru – Ruins of a Gracious Past

Sometimes, though, letters can be a joy for entirely different reasons. Like the reaction of Twihards to the news that their beloved vampire lover has not been handed the keys to the establishment by People Magazine. Instead, they declared some stupid pirate the Sexiest Man Alive. What is this, old people? 1948? It’s an outrage!

Lainey, I just don’t know what I’m going to tell my daughter when she comes home from school today. Lauren is in grade 10 and we both love RPattz. I have been online all morning trying to sort through this mess. How could this happen? How could People Mag make such a mistake? I am devastated and so will Lauren. We both expected to celebrate with Rob today and now it just feels like a death in the family. I can’t wait for the New Moon show on Friday. We have tickets for two shows back to back. Hopefully that will take the sting away. Thanks for listening. From Ashley R

I love that she’s been “online all morning trying to sort through this mess” like it’s some kind of bill that went awry and all she needs to do is bug the company about it long enough and it will turn out ok. :mrgreen:

I don’t even know what to do with the “We both expected to celebrate with Rob today” – I just realized I’ve never felt that way about any celebrity ever. Good God.

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Posted by on November 18, 2009 in Entertainment, Life, Movies, News, Newsmakers