“Uncle,” said my cousin to my father over lunch. “You have a very high maintenance daughter.”
“Huh?” replied my hip (ha!) dad. “Speak English.”
“I am not!” I objected. “I merely like what I like – I don’t ask for special things. I just have decided opinions about what I want.”
“Right, I never said you were materialistic,” my cousin said. “I said you were high maintenance. And you just gave me the very definition of high maintenance.”
Appreciative chuckles all around the table.
Oh my God. I’m high maintenance? Was it in When Harry Met Sally that Billy Crystal said the worst kind of woman is the kind that’s high maintenance but thinks she’s low maintenance? So now I’m Meg Ryan with the fakest fake orgasm known to man? Ah, that Harry. Such a moron. Fictional, too. What’s he know anyway.
Take for instance, Headmistress over at Salt and Schizophrenia: would she tag me to name ten different blogs that make my day if I was so hard to please? Wait, don’t answer that! Instead, take a look at my list. For the sake of variety, I thought I’d put up the names of ten blogs that I lurk at instead of the usual suspects (you know who you are!). Good thing too coz HM apparently hangs out at the same places as I do. Here are my ten in no particular order:
- Calcutta Chromosome – “Exactly five years ago, I wore a conical, white cap and walked around a bonfire seven times with a strange woman” begins one post. What! I thought to myself. He was a Ku Klux Klan member? Did he cook and eat that woman or something? What strange friends the Mad Momma keeps, I thought. Turns out he was describing his wedding. Erm. 😳 Fun read.
- Orange Jammies – I have been searching for this woman’s blog forever! For some reason I’d always end up on some weird Yahoo messenger-y page and never be able to navigate to the blogging section. I think she did it just in case I tagged her with something. Hmmm. Clever. But I caught up finally, didn’t I? Muahahahah!
- Ultra Violet – I know! I know! I put an “ism” blog here! Bad, bad Amrita! But can I help it if I like the women who write there? I mean I like women (generally that is, not sexually speaking, although when I think of some of the men who’ve hit on me, I might just be talking sexually as well) and I like these writers. Don’t worry, none of them want you to kick your parents out, send you to jail, cut your balls off or put you in a concentration camp coz you were born male.
- Domain Maximus – I was beginning to lose my faith in the commentators at Rediff. Here sits Sidin writing his heart out for them, frequently at the expense of his blog readers, and none of them had the good taste to commend his efforts by complaining that he was doing his job i.e. writing in English? By God, had Raja Sen taught them the lingo by his unceasing use of high falutin’ Angrezi? But no, false alarm! They were simply biding their time. My faith in humanity has been restored.
- Itchy Feet – One of these days I’ll leave a comment on Charukesi’s blog. Just as soon as I think of something more intelligent than, “Duh, that’s pwetty! And I – uh – agree.”
- Project Why – Anouradha’s blog does the very opposite of making my day but if there’s a person who walks the talk, that’s her. Check it out.
- Queerty – They don’t really need the traffic but I find the “gay agenda” quite riveting. Especially when accompanied by photos of drool-worthy men in their underwear. Yes, I’m that shallow. This is news to you?
- FilmiGeek – Because she’s awesome. Period.
- Doing Jalsa and Showing Jilpa – I’d ask what that title meant but I’m afraid of the answer. Besides, I get the feeling that I should probably know what it means. DesiGirl put me on to him and it’s one of the many reasons I love her. Snark, baby, snark.
- Sunny Days – Had to have a mom blogger. Decided to go with this one coz Sue is possibly one of the bravest, most open writers I’ve ever seen. Period. Mom bloggers usually are coz they’re writing about the most personal aspect of their lives but Sue takes it up a notch in my opinion. I don’t think I could ever be that open so I’m in awe.
Whew! This was a tough one coz there were so many of you whose work I’ve been reading over the past few months. Open tag, people. All yours.